Can We Talk About Vlad Jr’s Playing Shape For A Second?

Are we gonna pretend like this isn’t a thing? #itsearly pic.twitter.com/woZBxJKcUu

— Dean Blundell (@ItsDeanBlundell) July 26, 2020

Look.  Vlad’s shape is a problem for the Blue Jays. There’s no fat shaming here….trust me, but Vlad’s quarantine 15 is going to be an issue if they have to keep ‘getting him off his feet’ to DH every second game when he’s supposed to be learning how to play first.

You’re going to hear and see these words a TON if you watch baseball so get used to it:

“Each game is worth three games’ and ‘It’s a 60 game schedule’ and it matters having an engaged Vlad Jr in good playing shape on the field all the time if the Blue Jays want to see postseason baseball.   If the plan is to throw a bunch of shit against the wall to see what sticks and you’ve already put your generational power hitter at first (where you don’t lose a lot of games), why the fuck would you DH him in the second game of the season?  If you want him to lose weight, play him.

Ever the diplomat, here’s Charlie Montoyo when asked about Vlad Guerrero Jr’s weight/conditioning: “There’s always room for improvement.”#BlueJays

— John Lott (@LottOnBaseball) July 26, 2020

The way I see it and from what I’ve heard from guys like Ben Wagner (who’s been the only person to say anything) Montoyo is either punishing Vlad for being out of shape or he’s protecting him because he’s out of shape.

Bottom line?

Vlad Jr is out of shape and no one wants to say anything because we live in the softest time known to man.

Are we going to stay in our lane because I’m not shaming anyone but people like you look for performance points with stupid tweets like this? He’s an athlete.

— Dean Blundell (@ItsDeanBlundell) July 26, 2020

This is different.

Imagine if someone agreed to pay you 10 million to model for a few years.  Then imagine you showed up to model 30 pounds more than you were when you were hired.

Vlad is being paid to hit bombs and play first base every day and PROFESSIONALLY he needs to be in the kind of shape where that’s a reality.  That’s part of his job.  There are clauses in contracts for professional athletes dictating they have to be ‘ready to play’ and if Vlad’s not in the game because of his lack of conditioning he’s not ready to play so suck on that, social justice dicks.

Thicccc https://t.co/ZLOJtzk9UQ

— Riverboat Gambler #letsroll (@JaybirdCFC) July 27, 2020

The Jays dropped 2 of three in Tampa including shitting on a 2 run lead in 9th today, but the Vlad stuff bugged the shit out of me all weekend because we’re too afraid to talk about his weight.  If he doesn’t give a shit, you don’t need to publically care for him btw.  It’s common sense.  We’re so concerned with hurting Vlad’s feeling’s or raising the ire of larger SJW’s, we’re not talking about the game of baseball and that lazy.  If you’re out of shape and seeing another person on your TL out of shape bugs you, mix in a salad or stay in your lane.  You’re killing sports.

To all the people that say we all gained weight over Quarantine times..Fuck off..
HIGHLY PAID ATHLETES NEED TO KEEP THEIR SHIT FINE TUNED..
Exhibit A..
Look at the Raptors.
Machines.

— Scott Mason (@ScottMason420) July 26, 2020

If the Jays have a chance, Vlad needs to get a juice, Tiger.  I love the kid and hope he’s as legendary as he supposed to be but he has to stop with the late-night snacking and get into everyday playing shape in the next three days.
As for me, there’s a 4 pack of Cinnebons calling my name so I’ll be eating those post 9:30 pm like a rabid honey badger because unlike Vlad Jr, I don’t get paid to baseballs to the fucking moon.

The Blue Jays (+135) trail the Red Sox (-145) 2-1 after Vlad Jr. demolishes this home run.pic.twitter.com/utX6SrLdWC

— The Action Network (@ActionNetworkHQ) May 23, 2019